dreams about being murdered


whatever im missing, i dont know where to look for it

i took a shower and i already feel like ive done too much today


want: http://popwatch.ew.com/popwatch/2009/02/monster-mash-up.html



dude. seriously. im just sayin'...


I've completed week one Days 1 and 2. It's kind of exciting.
nothing is quite as scary as seeing a friend in dire straits

nothing is quite as satisfying as making a bold statement about how you refuse to be treated at work

8 years ago I started my dating career. I wonder if I really learned anything.



Yay for mini projects.

Monday should be a good place to start.


So, I have this story that I'm writing. I started writing it a long time ago, but I found it again. I feel that it has real potential for being a story that I'll be proud of.

Most exciting about it:

It is not an allegory for anything.
It is not true.
It is not about me.
It is like a puzzle for my mind.


Teh Internets

Where would I be without stumble upon? Oh, right... asleep and happy.



- Available: Already Taken
- Age: About Twenty-Four
- Annoyance: Allspice (check the ingredients list... liars)
- Animal: Aardvark

- Beer: Bottled
- Birthday: Breast Cancer Awareness Month. Michael Jordan. Orwell Novel
- Best Friend: Beer
- Blind or Deaf: Both
- Best weather: Beach Or Blizzard
- Been in Love: Been In And Out
- Believe in Magic: Blasphemy
- Believe in Santa: Bah, Humbug

- Candy: Cadbury
- Color: Cut Grass
- Chocolate/Vanilla: Choc-illa
- Chinese/Mexican Food: Chinet
- Cake or pie: Cut A Slice Of Each
- Continent to visit: Collecting All Seven, Three Down
- Cheese: Cheddar

- Day or Night: Dark
- Dancing in the rain: Define Dancing

- Eyes: Eh
- Everyone's got: E. Coli
- Ever failed a class: Eleven

- First thoughts waking up: Food
- Food: Friendly

- Greatest Fear: Growing Old
- Goals: Getting Gone
- Gum: Green
- Get along with your parents: Get Real

- Hair Color: Hay
- Height: Half-Dime' Niner"
- Happy: Hardcore
- Holiday: Half-Birthday
- How do you want to die: How I Was Born, On Accident

- Ice Cream: In A Cone
- Instrument: iPod?

- Jewelry: Jewels
- Job: Jack-Of-All-Trades

- Kids: Keen
- Kickboxing or karate: Karate (the band)
- Keep a journal: Keep? I Give It Away

- Love: Lol
- Laughed so hard you cried: Love

- Milk flavor: Malted?
- Movies: Many
- Motion sickness: Motion Wellness
- McD’s or BK: My Way

- Number: Numerous, Primes Are Nice

- One wish: Only One? Okay, Accomplishment

- Pepsi/Coke: Pibb
- Perfect Pizza: Pepperoni... And Everything Else
- Piercings: Penis

- Quail: Quite

- Reality T.V.: Reality Vomiting
- Radio Station: Real Music
- Roll your tongue in a circle: Readily
- Ring size: Regulation

- Song: Sing One
- Shoe size: Shodden? Seldom.
- Salad dressing: Sudden Valley Ranch
- Sushi: So Spendy
- In the shower: Sometimes
- Strawberries/Blueberries: Snozberries

- Tattoos: Ten
- Time for bed: Ten Past 0500
- Thunderstorms: Thunderstruck

- Unpredictable: Universally

- Vacation spot(s): VA 32° South

- Weakness: Wanderlust
- Which one of your friends acts the most like you: Walter
- Worst feeling: Wanderlust
- Worst Weather: Winter

- X-Rays: X-citing

-Year it is now: Y2K9
-Yellow: Yet To Be Proven

- Zoo animal: Zebra


The Most Romantic Day

On the 12th I noticed that I was coming down with something or other. There was some sort of chest pain and coughing. On the 13th I slept for 12 hours minus however long it takes to eat 3 bowls of cereal. Work that night was miserable as I felt the chest pain much more and I also felt a good deal of muscle soreness. On the 14th I had a full blown fever along with complete weakness of all muscles and severe joint pain. I did muster up the strength to take a shower, but afterward I was exhausted. Allison came over to take care of me. Which means that she brought me water and watched tv while I slept. Or maybe she slept too. It's hard for me to remember. I think that we also went to get steak and shake. By the 15th, my fever was gone and I had enough energy to drive and teach driving. Sunday was a lot of fun. However, by the end of the day I was spent. I didn't go out like I had wanted to.

It wasn't the most romantic day or weekend, but it was very nice. It was calm. Sometimes calm is better than wine-dine-sixty-nine.

I'll try not to be sick next year.




Friday The Thirteenth

I feel like death. My brain is fried. I have nothing left in me because I gave it all away. Tmw is v-day, the start of spring training. I found a bottle of hydroxyzine but I can't remember what it's supposed to do. I think it makes your hands swell up to twice their normal size.

To quote a nickel: "Ocean in view! O! The joy!"



So, today we had SS1 down contingency on mid. It was awesome. I proved myself once again. The stories are inane outside of the context of work, but I they give me a strong sense of accomplishment and pride.


My Horoscope According To The Onion

Northerly winds will whisper the name of a former love in your ear, ruthlessly mocking you for having had a relationship with someone called "Ooooouuuuussssshhhhhh."


Such a Good Weekend

It was marvelous, really. We got mom out of the house. Had a Savoy day. I met a 14 year old girl named Rachel Anne. Watched Push. (don't pay full price to watch Push) I met her parents, she met mine. I partied with my facebook mom and met new people. I drove, aimlessly, around C-U listening to good music. It was good. All so very good. It felt very complete and wholesome. The only person I didn't see that I wanted to this weekend was Olivia. But I think she's dead anyway. And, the only person I saw this weekend that I didn't want to was.... no one.

Some great quotes

Lady filling up at the gas station: "Are you going to an 80's party?"
Me: "What?"
L: "Are you going to the 80's party?!"
M: "No, I just like to look good."
L: "Yeah you do!!"

Some Girl: "Your shirt is cool, they look like amoebas."

Rachel: "Paisley is a curtain."

Rachel: "I don't care what we do, I'm liquid!"

Me: "I don't care what we do, but I'm going to be liquid in about 15 minutes."

Allison: "You can't call my sister that!"

Joshua: "It's with Leonardo DiCaprio and Kate Winslet. They have a bad relationship and it takes the whole movie to make it painful."



Mocking the sodium lights
The man sneers above the trees
His skin is a craggy orange

I am also gibbous
Am I waxing? Yes
But I will wane
Before I am new

The moon rises
And sets daily
Feel the cycle


McSweeney's Time!

Teasers Actually
Found on Craigslist
That Would Make Even
Less Promising

Modesty Plates.

New Texting Acronyms
for the Elderly.

Endnotes, and
That Cost Me Marks
on My Thesis.


Oh math, you complete me. I only wish that my daily life would challenge me with original, relevant math problems more often. Being any higher at work would help as there are a multitude of numbers to play with at work. However, as it is I only get to play with little things. Last night: 109 down calls between twi and mid. Twi accounted for 62 of them. Last week there was a day that I was responsible for 117 down calls. One word: awesome.

Speaking of numbers, I have a little circle I need to sell.

Beka: moderate fuzzies.



I just found out that there is a verzion txting only plan. It's $35/mo. It's so tempting. I only talk about 100 min/month... but then it wouldn't be worth it, would it?



So, I didn't get my computer fixed, but I did fix my father's laptop... without total replacement.

In the last (checks calendar) 5 days a lot has happened. Let's start with Bar Stool Golf. I received a call at 10am from Bobbo. He said that he, Keller, and RJ were going to do some bar stool golf and they needed a fourth person. I figured that this was just an excuse to do some drinking on a Saturday morning. They said that we'd have a drink at a few bars and shoot some golf. I figured this was Golden Tee Golf (arcade style). So, sure, count me in.

Turns out that Bar Stool Golf is a serious drinking event that occurs annually. See link for related Danville Bar Stool Golf (same organization, different chapter) Link

It starts at 11am and score cards are to be turned in at 5pm. Thus, it is 6 hours of drinking in which a fair number of participants bring putters (aka, weapons). Fantastic. I quit golfing at 730pm with one fewer pairs of sunglasses but one additional putter. I only spent $20. I'm going to attend this event every year from here on out.

Kate and Allison were very understanding of me showing up at their apartment at 745-ish, drunk, and then passing out 45 minutes later. They knew about the event and felt sorry that I accidentally was a participant.

I awoke at, 11pm or so, and had every intention of going out, but stayed in instead.

The next morning we three went to Steak n Shake. I didn't know that they served breakfast. Very tasty.

Followed up Shake n Shake with some clearance shopping at circuit city, among other stores. I slept through the Super Bowl and today fixed a computer.

I am very happy. I am 100 percent sure that I have a girlfriend. Her name is Allison. If you see me smiling for no reason... well I do have a reason.